I wish I knew why I kept doing this to myself.
I wish I knew why he keeps playing tricks and why I keep falling for them.
I wish I could stop feeling like this everyday.
I wish I knew how he felt.
I wish I didn’t love him.
Why is it that we always love the ones we can’t have?
It just won’t work, there isn’t time, parents don’t like them, friends don’t like and so on and so on. It’s the most devastating feeling in the world.
Yet we never seem to want to give up. I sure know I don’t. I am the worst possible example for relationships. I am way too involved in something that I don’t even know will become official. And if it ever does if it will even last.
Unfortunately, I have no advice on how to fix it. The way I see it is that I don’t want to say I didn’t try.
I seriously think I am just not a roommate person. I’ve been living with them for over a month now, living in a house, separate rooms and everything yet they still drive me up the wall.
Could just be me. Wouldn’t be too surprised. I like living with other people basically for the company. But if I could, and possibly might, live by myself. Sure it’d get lonely but I would have control of my own place and no one else.
Sorry I can’t be around to do much here but no one should be expecting me to be at the house 24/7 just to see my roommates every once and a while. I pay my rent and continue on with my life. I do not have parents in this house. If something is going on then something is going on. Sure I’m a procrastinator but that doesn’t mean I don’t like keeping busy. I’m always preoccupied, however whether it’s because I’m doing my homework or not is unrelated.
Maybe I should just live by myself until I start dating someone and then live with them. I can only imagine how that is going to go.
I SHOULD NOT BE AWAKE
I really hope I’m not getting into the college life style of staying up all hours just to finish a paper. I’m a night owl when I want to go out. During the week I like to have the mentality of an old woman and go to bed at ten.
I should quit my job. Sleeping is more important.
Mmm sleep. Excuse the rambling.
That paper was the worst I’ve ever written. Thank god it’s not the final draft because I give up now.
Good night all you night owls!
You’d think having to write a narrative would be the easiest thing to do. Better than attempting to write a slightly decent paper about a subject you honestly just don’t give a damn about.
Even when you are writing about yourself for some bullshit english class everyone is forced to take in college you know that your professor will be reading this, possibly your peers, and even worse is that they know who you are.
How can you ask me to write about something personal without being too personal? So again, I am left with a lousy story of my life when my other drafts were much more interesting and way too inappropriate for a professor to be reading.
Blogging for the win. Anonymous is better.
Even though I am a girl we are honestly the worst. We hate each other for no reason. Pick fights. Gossip. Tell secrets. The list goes on and on.
I am frustrated with dealing with other girls problems. I have my own issues so leave me alone.
I’ll always be there for my friends but absolutely refuse to make your problems my problems.
Sure I’ve made mistakes, no where near to being perfect but no one is. And anyone who think they are or they are better than others need a fucking reality check.
I would just to have one night of drama free. No more gossiping or telling secrets or blaming me for shit that I didn’t do in the first place.
Unfortunately these girls don’t exist.
I love being a girl, but not at all the time.
Boys suck. I’m PMSing.
I want some alcohol and chocolate and to throw a fucking rager.
Who else wants to join?
(Source: ecced3ntesiastx, via collegekids)
Love.
Seems to be the only thing people are concerned with finding these days. I know I have been. It is a wonderful and beautiful feeling to be in love. But many don’t realize how young we are and how much time we have to find that special someone.
Until then, love our friends, love our families and most importantly love ourselves. The last one we tend to forget. You must first love who you are before you learn to love someone else.
